Thursday, August 20, 2015

Half a lifetime

Years later, when I am stuck with dementia and Alzheimer's and everything else that is in trend in that era, I figured I would need something to remind me of the life that has been. If not of everyday, atleast the ones which matter. Thus inspired, I embark on making a note of the lessons learned in my half (presumably) of a lifetime so far. The good, the bad and the ugly.

- It always takes the wrong person to inspire you to do the right thing.
- It is but, natural to think that as you age, your thoughts and actions are smarter. But never forget that your parents have aged and gotten smarter too. They never stop making sense of the situation. Atleast not less than you. Ever.
- When somebody has been heartless enough to hurt or break you more than you can endure, do not hesitate to cut them out from your life for good. Wish them well, but never forget. It may take years to forgive too, but do not let them be around to hurt you the same a second time. Sometimes people do not hesitate to repeat the same mistake over and over even when they say they understand you. Everybody is selfish enough to ignore your pain over their gains. Maybe you will be too.
- There isn't anybody without shortcomings or helplessness in their lives in most situations. But when somebody cannot be honest with you about it, do not assume your presence makes a difference. It will not even be missed even long after you are gone.
- Blood is not thicker than water. Random people at different phases of my life have literally saved me and helped me become who I am now. And not all of them are related by blood. Vice versa too.
- It is never an offense to love or to dream of a life together. But never make promises you cannot honor. Or even actions that reek of unspoken promises. Lot is at stake. Hearts are precious to everyone. Especially when it's your own.
- Make money. Plenty of it or atleast enough to own the ground beneath your feet. Because people come and leave your life for want of it or lack of it. The only thing that kept me going all along was a career affording me my individuality and an opinion. Every woman needs a financial security to keep her dreams alive.
- Children, babies, music and pets are the best remedy to any problem. They can do away any scar, no matter how deep it runs.
- Sometimes the best ever feeling is to be hugged so hard you beg to breathe. Or to wake up next to a warm little baby sleeping in the cradle of your arms. Or a smile from your parents. Or a wonderful spread of your favorite things to eat. A happy stomach is a happy heart too.
- Every time you fall down, take your own time to get back on your feet again. Because once you are up, you should never fall down again for the same reason. Once is a mistake, twice is stupidity.
- Always embrace solitude. If you don't find happiness on being on your own, you cannot expect somebody else to find happiness in you.
- It is perfectly fine to lie and stare at the ceiling for hours because you cannot convince your body that to get up will not hurt anymore. It is equally fine to think that making your morning coffee is the biggest achievement of your day.
- Relationships are meant to be made or broken. But you are not.
- Never give up on your dreams.
- Always muster enough courage to apologize to people you have hurt. Never leave anyone with unanswered questions or incomplete phases. Karma is a b***h indeed.
- Never assume responsibility for somebody else's lack of character.
- Love is always action. Everything else is just words.
- You are never perfect. But to the right person, you will always be the perfectly imperfect better half.
- Expect nobody to always reciprocate your feelings for them. Teach yourself to respect their freedom of expression too. But hate yourself if you let them take advantage of your words or actions.
- It is always possible for somebody who meant the life to you to suddenly just become a stranger who knows everything about you.
- Never wait for clarifications or explanations from people who refuse to acknowledge their part in it. Be gracious enough to save them the trouble and walk out.
- The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman's love with no intention of loving her. Forget your heart and follow your head when it advises you.
- Do your bit to give back to the society you live in. There are people with real issues, issues bigger than just broken hearts and failed relationships.
- Make your life a journey. Have a companion who complements the journey. It is better to be single than being with the wrong person.
- Age graciously, with maturity. Appreciate the finer things in life.
- Always have a hobby to make you forget the monotony of daily life.
- Learn to fall in love with the beauty of your own smile and laughter.